How do I talk to people who are "wrong"? Don't burn me yet

[Green_Elite_Cab]

People who "know" they are right will not listen. It's easier to just walk away.

Tom

Yes, walk away knowing that you're right and save yourself the possibility of an argument and the frustrations of trying to tell someone that knows it all that they don't.... There is nothing about this hobby, or any other for that matter, that is worth getting frustrated over.

While the "FL9" discussion might be a more extreme example, I feel like I run into dozens of less clear-cut incidents like this every week that play out in a similar fashion. Most of these people are "stubborn know it all" types, they're just regular people.

I suppose my big fear is that I am the Know it all. I certainly have already earned that reputation.

At my club, I am notorious for taking one look at a modified track plan for a given area (of which most people are happy with the changes), and then finding all sorts of problems with it.

I don't go up to them like "THIS IS WRONG!", but I usually do try to communicate my rationale backed with evidence, and suggest alternatives. Much of the time my suggestions are reasonable and they get put into place. However, I can't shake that feeling that I'm coming off as "The Know it All", finding faults with everything, causing trouble.

Its frustrating because though I may have a few areas of expertise, I don't think I know more than anyone else overall, and I don't expect people to know everything (I know I certainly don't!). I don't think less of people.

I feel though, that every time I express a dissenting opinion, or present a fact that challenges someone's assertions, that I come off this way.

If I'm watching a movie about the cave man fighting dinosaurs, what could I gain by telling the producer that they supposedly never existed at the same time? He's happy with his thoughts, I'm happy knowing what I know about this relationship. This may be a bad analogy, but the point is, no matter what you say, you most likely won't change what this guy thinks, even if you're right, and you risk making an enemy of someone....

This reminds me of the intro to one of my favorite shows... "I you're wondering how he eats and breaths, and other science facts, just repeat to yourself its just a show, I should really just relax!" MST3K was all about the bad movies, but they had fun with them.

I tend to try to apply this thinking to model railroading as well. Its supposed to be fun first!