GEC's Layout Progress

[Green_Elite_Cab]

Sometimes I just feel worn out!

Vent/Rant Time

Why do I purchase more things, but never finish them? I suppose I have known many modellers who have a stockpile of kits. Still, I feel like I rarely finish anything.

Sometimes its not necessarily my fault. Sometimes the right paint isn't out there, or I'm waiting on out of stock parts. Some kits frustratingly may never have the appropriate parts, especially ones were I took a risk and picked up something unique.

Still, some projects sit unfinished, but the appropriate parts are out there. My C30-7 needs #33 Kadee couplers instead of #5s because of the fit. Why haven't I picked them up? My Ex-LV GP18 project needs that yellow/orange colored paint they used on the handrails and details, why haven't I picked that up? My GP40P just needs a decoder and some decals, why haven't I picked those up?

Its easy to rationalize it as not being able to get to a hobby shop, or trying to cut back on spending. And yet, instead of picking up these simple and relatively "cheap" things, I've managed to pick up even more models, many of which are kits that will require work.

I've ended up with at least one new locomotive, 4 new MU car kits, and a couple more cabooses.

I feel like I sit around watching for the next thing, almost always rare/limited production/marked down, and at the time, it feels like if I don't jump on it, I won't see it again.

For instance, the new locomotive I picked up was an Atlas Conrail B23-7 #2816. Atlas Conrail B23-7s are apparently difficult to come by, particularly the "early" style ones such as #2816. It was sound equipped, but I managed to get it for closer to the price of a non-sound locomotive. Certainly a good opportunity, but did I really need to buy it right then?

Part of me argues yes, part of me reasons that if I wait long enough one will likely show up again. Yet another part reasons there is no way to know when things will show up

I feel like I cannot prioritize correctly. It is not so much that I am prioritizing entirely wrong. I definitely give my life needs, my family, and my job greater priority.

However, I feel like by the time I have time to work on my trains I am distracted/exhausted, and when I think about them, my thoughts always wonder into the future and how great all those new Silverliners will look some day, instead of the unfinished kits they are. In a way, I feel like I am split between everything, and cannot focus on a given thing for too long.

Even worse, I feel like if I have any kind of obligation at all, I just shut down. I don't have school anymore, but for instance, if I have a project I need to do, or I know I have to go somewhere, I'll feel unable to work on my trains, and waste most of the day away, even if I could not reasonably work on said project, or if the appointment I have is many hours away.

In the end, I feel like I get things done in "short bursts". One day, like today, I will get fed up, say to hell with everything else, and I'll try to get something done. With any luck, I won't be immediately shut down by a lack of parts or extreme indecision.

I might get something done today because I am sufficiently wound up, but that's the real problem right there. Why should have to be wound up and frustrated to get something done? Its supposed to be a hobby, it supposed to be fun. Instead, I've nearly mentally exhausted myself before I've even begun.

Now that those thoughts are off my mind....

I do have some new things, I'll post pictures soon.